Alien

I need to write down how I feel right now. Maybe you get me.

I'm lonely. I miss my kid. Yet, I'm deeply proud of this amazing opportunity to work with brilliant young people here in Mexico. A student told me recently that no other professor has ever sat and talked with them, nor remembered their name. It broke my heart a bit because everyone should have somebody to talk to.

Are humans naturally lonely people? Do they seek connections with others to validate their own meaning? Do they hurt others to satisfy the stinging burn of their own pain?

Ever feel like an alien? I've spent four decades and traveled to dozens of countries trying to figure out human beings, but I'm no closer than I was when I felt terrified in first grade. I smile a lot, and everyone thinks I'm happy all the time. I'm horrified of people, and just trying to navigate this weird planet is a heavy task sometimes. I have a job to do, and I'm going to raise my son with love and light.

I think I'll go for a walk.